To all parents and stepparents who are co-parenting impressionable and innocent children:
If you’re having issues with each other and struggling to make this co-parenting thing healthy, please keep it off social media. It stays here forever and your child will see it one day. If you’re being outright ugly then please understand that you’re not winning the battle, you’re poisoning your child. If you’re being passive aggressive, trying to take digs at the other parent while trying to look like the bigger person, it’s not working. That’s the most transparent way of toxic co-parenting. Your child is the one who will suffer and it keeps the cycle going instead of putting a stop to it. Allowing bitterness to rule your actions towards the other parent is fueling the fire, not helping to put it out.
Your job is to find a way to be kind and loving to the other parent, regardless of the other parent’s behavior. Don’t let someone else’s actions lower you to a level that hurts your child.
Bad mouthing the other parent, rolling your eyes at the mention of their name and trying to one up the other parent are easy ways to push your child in the opposite direction of where you want them to go. Never let your feelings towards the other parent outweigh your love for your child.
Before opening your mouth to speak to the other parent, ask yourself if your words will hurt or help your child in the long run.
Before you post something snarky or repost a passive aggressive article directed toward them, ask yourself if it’s working towards healthy co-parenting that benefits your child. Social media is a dangerous place to try to win your co-parenting battle and can go terribly wrong with just one click.
If you’re the custodial parent, noncustodial parent or stepparent, you are equally responsibly in the co-parenting equation and every single action you take can either hurt your child or give your child the best situation possible. It’s up to you. The child didn’t ask to be in the center of any of it and your responsibility as the adult is to not let it have a negative effect on the child.
Rise above it.
Let it go.
Do what is truly in the best interest of the child and get over yourself.
And please, please keep it off social media!