My autistic daughter’s current best friend is a sponge and I love it.

I was just about to pour my coffee when I heard her little voice next to the sink. She was talking in a different voice, like she was someone else. Much to my delight she had the dish sponge and was pretending that it was talking to her.

“Justin do you want your own sponge?”

“Really mommy?”

I pulled out a new sponge and handed it to her.

The look on her face was that of a young woman being handed a diamond ring by her love. Priceless.

When we headed out for the day she asked if she could take the sponge with her. It wouldn’t have mattered what my answer was because the sponge was going. That’s just the way it goes in our little autism world. We roll with whatever the day  brings, think outside the box and accept things out of the norm. Once she becomes attached to something there is no separating until she is ready.

She was not and is not ready.

The sponge never left her hands.
Not through shopping.
Not through lunch.
Not through the car ride.
The sponge never left her hands.

I welcomed the smiles and the concerned looks. Who wouldn’t stare at a kid that was carrying around a dish sponge and holding a conversation with it? I talked to the sponge as if it was listening. We saved it a seat at lunch. I almost let her talk me into buying it a t-shirt , almost.

Justin is a square peg and this world is a round hole.
She simply doesn’t fit in.
I think it’s one of the most beautiful things about my family.
I know it’s the most beautiful thing about her.

She told the other kids in her Sunday school that she was going to be President and there was nothing they could do about it. She never brushes her hair because she says it looks better that way. Her clothes never match. Her shoes are rarely tied. Occasionally she has a random band-aid on her forehead for no reason at all. She talks to herself constantly. She has several inanimate objects as friends. She takes naps at restaurants and she’ll tell you straight to your face if she sees anything weird about you.

She doesn’t want to be like anyone else. She doesn’t look around and try to do what others are doing, wear what they’re wearing or act like they’re acting. She just does what makes her happy and right now having a sponge as her best friend is what makes her happy. If it makes her happy then I love it.

I find myself trying way too hard to fit in. I see what others are wearing and even if it’s not necessarily my style I wonder to myself if I might be able to pull it off. I go to people’s homes and it looks like Pinterest threw up all over it and I find myself planning some ridiculous crafting project to throw on my wall.

We aren’t designed to be like everyone else.
We are made to be unique, special, one of a kind.There isn’t a single person like you anywhere in the world. There is no one as beautiful as you, it’s impossible. From the tip of your eye lashes to the tip of your toes you are the most beautiful you that there could ever be. From you thoughts to your actions, from words to your whispers you are one of a kind.  I think that’s amazing. I think we should embrace it, go with it, love it and completely accept that we are our own perfect selves. We are all square pegs.

I think I might grab a sponge out of the cabinet today a make myself a new friend. He’ll go to lunch with me, shopping, hang out in the car and help me clean up the house a little later if I’m lucky.

Today I’m going to look at things through Justin’s eyes and I’m going to welcome the stares, they just might find me as beautiful as I find Justin.


Lunchtime with Sponge. sb1



Just hanging out in the car with Sponge




Shoe shopping with Sponge




You know you do it too. Old Navy with Sponge. 




When your daughter asks you to take a picture with her sponge and she wants you to make “this face” you just do it.


2 thoughts on “My autistic daughter’s current best friend is a sponge and I love it.

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