Unexpected Thankfulness: When God wrecks your plans.

thanksgiving

There are things in my life that I never planned on being thankful for and never really wanted to be thankful for but today I get to look back and see how God’s plan is so much better than my own. I get to give thanks for the unexpected.

My plan was to marry, become a judge, have 6 sons and live happily ever after in my huge mansion filled with boys.

God’s plan was different.

I am thankful for His plan and not my own.

I am thankful for my first husband and the daughter we have together. I am thankful for our divorce, not because I don’t love him or want him in my life but because it has taught me how to be a better person and a better mom than I could have ever been inside my own little plan. The divorce showed me how not to be selfish, how to compromise, how to share without stipulations and manipulation.  Today I am thankful for my divorce.

I was supposed to live happily ever after with my husband but God handed us a test. In the blink of an eye he showed us what we had to lose. He took us to our very bottom and that became the moment when we realized what unconditional love, forgiveness and faith looks like. This test renewed us and gave us a whole new life together. Today I am thankful for the mess in my marriage.

My mansion didn’t turn out to be as big as I thought it would and while our home seemed big when we moved in as a family of three it is now busting at the seams. Every room is filled with laughter and love. Our family is closer than I ever imagined. I wouldn’t turn my nose up to a bigger bathroom but having my home filled with my children is far better than the floor plans I had in mind. Today I am thankful that my dream mansion is simply our cozy home.

I pictured all of my children being the smartest in class, the funniest, the most social. I just imagined that they would excel at everything and never struggle. I guess these are things that we all hope for our children. God gave us something better than any of that. He gave us a little girl with autism. He gave us a special needs child. It’s the  most amazing thing that He has ever given to me. Our family gets to see the world in a way that most will never get to. We get to experience life through the eyes of a child who see everything brighter, clearer and differently than the rest of us.  Today I am thankful that God thought this little girl was special enough to bless her and our family with autism.

As for those six sons that I was supposed to have, my house is filled with pink. Lots of pink! I never pictured myself with hair-bows or dealing with girl drama but these little girls light my entire world. They are my sunshine. They have taught me how to be a woman, how to be sensitive, how to be compassionate and how to love in a way I never knew.  In three short months our sweet baby James will join our family and I’m actually a little freaked out with the idea of raising a boy. The football team that I dreamed of turned out to be a cheer-leading squad. Today I am thankful for sugar and spice and everything nice but I also can’t wait to be blessed with snips and snails and puppy dog tails.

Today is a day of thanks.
Look around today and give thanks for those unexpected blessings that you may not have seen as gifts at the time.

Today say I love you.
Say I forgive you.
Say you are wanted.
Say you are a gift.

Today give grace and mercy.
Give forgiveness.
Give help.
Give love.
Give thanks.

 

5 thoughts on “Unexpected Thankfulness: When God wrecks your plans.

  1. I LOVE this! Thank you for writing it! I, too, am grateful for my divorce and that is something I NEVER, EVER, EVER, EVER, ever ever ever thought I’d say or feel. Ever. Thank you so much for writing this. It’s very beautiful and your family is very beautiful.

  2. I so love you…so proud of you!

    “What if my greatest disappointments
    Or the aching of this life
    Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can’t satisfy
    What if trials of this life
    The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
    Are your mercies in disguise”

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