For some reason there was a lot of talk about physical insecurities in my world this weekend. The beautiful people who spoke to me about what they thought was “wrong” with them were people who are physically flawless in my eyes. On Saturday night we went to Secret Keeper Girl and they talked about labels that we put on ourselves.
Some of those labels included ugly, unlovable and stupid. Oddly enough I had just written an email to a friend telling her how stupid I felt in certain situations.
SKG posted pictures of celebrities on the huge projector screen without their make up on. The audience had to guess who it was. Some of the women were unrecognizable without their professional make up. The speaker was making a point to the young girls that these women do not really look like what they appear to in the magazines and that even without all of that photo shopping, these women were still beautiful and it had nothing to do with what they looked like.
I sat there and started listing my flaw in my head. I have countless stretch marks on my stomach from carrying three 5 1/2 pound babies at one time. I have a bent rib, seriously. My mom thought that it was a tumor when I was an infant and had it check out, turns out it’s just a mild deformity. I will never have one of those perfectly toned tummies.
I wear a size 10 shoes and that’s not always cute.
I have a crease above both of my knees. When I was young my brother told me it was my fat folding over. He was joking of course but here I am 29 years later looking at me “fat” knees.
I have huge flat fingernails and never paint them so that the eye is not drawn to them.
I have a cowlick in my bangs. Growing up I thought it was called a catholic and told anyone who would listen that I had a catholic in my bangs.
My eyebrows consist of three colors, blonde, brown and red. In highschool someone actually wrote “tricolor” on my locker. It was lame and I couldn’t even get offended.
My ears stick out so far that my own father would tease me and call me “Magilla Gorilla” (google it).
And for my final insecurity, well the final one that I am going to list, I have a huge wrinkle between my eyebrows. It’s so big that makeup gets caught in it. It’s also long and in right in the middle of my face. I actually looked in to botox to get rid of it. I didn’t do it.
So cut back to me sitting next to my daughter this weekend praying for God to take her insecurities away and remind her that she is one of a kind and made perfectly in His eyes.
Um Hello! Wouldn’t that pertain to me as well?
Why would I sit there and try to convince her that she is one of the me most perfect girls that has ever been made when I can’t even convince myself that I am.
Editing My List
I made myself go back over my list of things that I don’t like about my physical self. My stretch marks are a reminder of the three gifts that God gave me to nourish. He trusted me with three of His angels at one time.
As far as that bent rib goes, I think it’s a gentle reminder of the body part that He created Eve from. It’s a constant reminder that I was made from my husband to be his partner. I was not made from dust, I was made from the very structure that supports my husbands body. We were literally made for each other.
My husband believes that my size 10 feet must have been made from a man as well. He’s a comedian. God gave me big feet so that when the storms that He was going to send me in life finally hit, I would have a sturdy ground to stand on. I’ve been shoved, kicked and pushed by Satan and he has never been able to make me lose my balance.
My brother pointed out that crease in my knees when he was hiding from me under a table and I walked up. We were kind of obsessed with hide and seek growing up. I never knew how much time I would spend on my knees in prayer. I thought they were a flaw but they put in me in a position to talk to God.
There is no flaw in that.
As for my huge flat fingernails, I can actually use them as a screw driver when I’m in a pinch. Laugh it up but next time you need to tighten that little screw on your glasses your going to be wishing you were me.
About that Catholic in my bangs, it’s actually given me a crazy sense of peace at one time. When my daughter was being tested for Autism they asked us a list of questions a mile long. They asked us several questions about her hair. Trust me, they will grasp at anything to try to find out why kids are autistic. They asked us if she had any swirls or cowlicks. Knowing that they were trying to relate that to a mental disorder in my daughter while I sat right there with one in my own hair gave me comfort. It made me just like my daughter and to be compared to her is a compliment.
My tri-colored eyebrows are proof that I am a natural blonde, so take that locker writer!
One of my triplets has ears that stick out and they are my favorite thing about her. I remind her all the time that God gave her ears like angels so that she could listen to peoples problems and help them. Is that why God gave me mine?
My grandfather had a huge crease between his eyebrows, so does my mother, my uncle and my brother. Theirs are all identical to the one I have between mine. Family history.
Are you making a list of your flaws or are you counting them as gifts? Let me remind you that you are flawless.
Your moles, your hips, your toes, your hair, your lips, your rear, your arms, your legs, your freckles, your ears and yes, even the crease in your knees were all hand crafted by God himself. He doesn’t make mistakes. Not even when He sends you down with a bent rib. If you are looking in the mirror and staring at what you think might be a mistake then grab a dry erase maker and write this across the mirror
For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well. Psalm 139:13-14
You are exactly the way that God intended you to be and God’s creations are always perfect. Always.
Creator of the heavens and earth. Our sweet Savior thank you for hand crafting me into what you see as perfection. When you breathed the breath of life in to my body I became your master piece. When I am picking out my flaws gentle turn me from my reflection and remind me that my beauty is in my heart. Let us be so confident in Your works that the people around us can’t help but to see Your beauty through us. Take away all of our insecurities. Help us to raise a generation of believers who will know that they are Your children and because of that they are perfect. In Jesus name, amen”.
My very favorite physical feature that I have are my very green eyes. Ironically I got them from my dad and when I look in the mirror I can’t help but to see him. God gave them to me to remind me that my earthly father gave me more than just heartache. From the very first moment of my first pregnancy I asked God to give me a baby with green eyes.
We have five blues eyed little girls.