I’m A Failure Of A Mother

As I was in the line to check out line at the grocery store I saw one of those ridiculous magazines that likes to spew false stories about celebrities. One of the story headlines read “JLo is a C- mom”. Really? I wonder who wrote this article. I highly doubt that this “insider” has ever spent any time with “JLo”,. oh crap I can’t carry on calling her that, her name is Jennifer for crying out loud. I’m not crazy about her but I really have no room to judge her. I don’t know her and I’m not the greatest mom so I certainly wouldn’t put a C- stamp on her abilities as a mother. I wonder why the person writing the article thought that she deserved a C- rating. Is it because she has nannies do most of the work. I call that lucky not lazy. Is it because she spoiled the crud out of those kids? I call that blessed not spoiled. Why in the world would someone write an article about someone that they don’t know and rate what kind of person they are. If my “insider” wrote a magazine article on me the headline would read “Candy C (just trying to relate to JLo here, stick with me) is an F+ mom”. I gave myself a little credit with the +, I didn’t want you to think that I was a total failure. My + is for the fact that I feed my children, bathe them, groom them and most of the time love them. Yep, I said most of the time. Let me give you some examples. My oldest daughter came home from camp today. She told me that she had lost her dorm key and that it cost $25 to place. WHAT! I lost it. I explained to her how hard someone had to work to make $25. She told me that it was no big deal and that they didn’t take her cash because they were just going to take it out of my credit card. Oh silly little girl, moms lesson starts now. I once made this child adopt a child from an underprivileged country with her own money because she spilled paint on our driveway and thought it was no big deal. Tonight when she asked what we were having for dinner I politely told her that she would be taking the family out to get tacos. She said “are you seriously going to make me use my $25 on dinner for everyone?”. I reminded her that her $25 was in the form of a lost credit card 100 miles away and my $25 was sitting in her pocket in the form of cold hard cash. I loved watching her see her sister eat the $25 that she thought was no big deal. Bad parenting or plain genius? A married couple that we are good friends with say that I have major “tough love” parenting. I’m cool with that. Make me a sash and I will proudly wear it. I know this one mom that put her baby in a basket and threw him in a river. Uh Oh. Her headline would probably read “Desperate Mom Throws Baby In River, F- rating!”. What the heck was she thinking? Who does that? I could sit here and judge her decision over and over and justify why I am a way better mother than she is. I could get all of my friends together and have a gossip session on her and what a horrible mother she is. The tabloids could rate her on their cover. She is probably one of those young moms, they never have any idea what to do. Maybe she was one of those moms that starts having kids too late in life and was too tired to care for him. Where the heck was her husband anyways? We could judge her. We would all be wrong. Yes, she threw her baby in a river. I don’t recommend it to anyone but did we stop to get the whole story? She had been warned that someone was coming to kill her infant son. She was desperate to save his life by any means necessary. She made a basket, one that would float like a boat. She gently set him in it and pushed it out in to the river. She would rather have taken the chance that someone find him away from where she was than have to watch him be put top death. The story has an amazing ending. That little boy grew up to be someone very amazing and with Gods direction he even parted the Red Sea. You won’t find a cheesy headline about him but you can read all about him starting in Exodus. I don’t think we are in a place to judge that mommy now. Why do we think that we can rate poor Jennifer Lopez who’s life is splattered all over every paper that we pick up? Can you imagine what it felt like for her when she picked up that magazine and saw that someone had actually rated what kind of mother she is. My feelings get hurt if one person says something about my parenting skills, I can’t imagine what she felt like to know that millions of people would see her rating. Lets stop comparing ourselves and rating others. We are all in this struggle and have been for centuries. Shouldn’t we embrace each other, help each other and support each other. We have children who are growing up and will one day become parents. Do we really want them to be rated on their parenting? Wouldn’t that really just be a reflection of how we raised them. I bet Moses’ mommy could have used a little more support. Let’s pray “Heavenly Father teach us how to have compassion for each other and open our eyes to help us see things in a different light. Help us to take the ratings off of peoples backs and put our arms there instead. Show us mercy and grace when we fall short of Your glory and make us warriors for each other. In Jesus name. amen”. Every time that my daughter gets a conduct mark in class or shows any sign of disrespect anywhere she has to sit down and write a letter to whomever she offended. It’s her least favorite punishment and I love it. C- for me too JLo, hang in there girl!

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